Palindrome: Roma summus amor

The emperor Aurelian

Saint Valentine—whose “acts”

mirror the res gestae (or "facts")

about Saints Marius and Martha,

supposèd Persian pilgrims,

put to death in the Colosseum,

during the Lupercalia,

(a pagan festival of love,

marriage, and fertility) this day,

in the crisis of the Third Century,

together with their sons,

Saints Audifax and Abachum—

is just . . . a sort of carbon copy.

Martyrdom's an industry

in the hemorrhaging empire,

whose ruler will in 275 CE

be murdered by his guards

on his way to war with Iran,

to "make Rome greater again."

Oh, confounded palindrome,

Roma summus amor,*

but slaughter is the butcher's tax!

All we can do is, as before, to roam.

Happy Saint Abachum’s Day!

Why won't you be my Audifax?

*Ancient Roman graffito: "Rome's all of love." https://www.nytimes.com/1973/01/21/archives/its-a-graffito-in-latin-and-its-a-palindrome.html?smid=url-share.

Friday, February 14, 2025

Three Limericks in Poor Taste

There was a curmudgeon in Rheims

Who lacked an appropriate stance.

When he met a young filly

Who teased, “Let’s be silly!”

He groaned, “Nana, I’m long past Brrromance.”

A cross-dresser in old Reykjavik

Once cut a young queen to the quick.

When they saw from their pants

They was eager to dance,

They said, “Sorry! I’m looking for Dick!”

A superannuated snow-bird at Mar-a-Lago,

Was unhappily not in the know.

When he saw on a pier,

“No refugees here!”

He thought it meant: “Bring back Jim Crow!”

Just say no to Guadalupe Hidalgo

A million refugees crowd our southern border.

They claim they merely seek a better life.

Is there any way to end this without strife?

Indeed there is! The solution’s made to order:

The Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo should go!

Give back to Mexico what was taken

from it at bayonet point in 1848—

Problem solved! No worries guys! Hey presto!!

Without Texas, California, Nevada,

Utah, and perhaps Arizona, I don’t know,

Those bracero hordes would still be in Mexico.

Well, perhaps that’s going a bit too far!

Las Vegas? Frisco? Silicon Valley?

Maybe, say, just everything south of LA??