O Fortuna, imperatrix mundi

The thirteenth-century Goliardic poem "O Fortuna" in the Carmina Burana manuscript. Bavarian State Library.

Oh, what a pity she had only one titty

To give her poor baby to suck;

The poor little bugger will never play rugger

Or give a young lady a fuck!

—British military traditional

It's said that poets should convey the truth,

But that I think's a bridge of sighs.

My own aim (Hope you don’t think it uncouth!)

Is crafting the most convenient lies,

For truth is never simple, and a lie is plain,

Bald-faced, relieving, can be used again,

As many times as needed to explain

Why you are screwed and I am not; defies

The premises of fortune and men's eyes.

My stocks rise, yours go down the drain,

The beautiful in love feel little strain!

Fortune, the Goliards knew, rules the world.

Hang on to that. And keep your bust umbrella furled.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goliards

Wednesday, November 5, 2025